12/27/2007

WHO'S RESPONSIBLE?

PZ Mwahaha commends his readers to check out the Buffalo Beast's "50 Most Loathsome List."

It is profane, obscene, brutally funny. And sobering. The part that most struck a chord with me is below. Warning: if any of this applies to you, you'll probably end up concluding that I'm a troubled character rather than engaging in honest self-assessment. And you'll probably want to drop a few zingers at my expense in the comment zone. And then I'll ask you to defend the charge that incites you. You've been warned....

"Charges: You believe in freedom of speech, until someone says something that offends you. You suddenly give a damn about border integrity, because the automated voice system at your pharmacy asked you to press 9 for Spanish. You cling to every scrap of bullshit you can find to support your ludicrous belief system, and reject all empirical evidence to the contrary. You know the difference between patriotism and nationalism -- it's nationalism when foreigners do it. You hate anyone who seems smarter than you. You care more about zygotes than actual people. You love to blame people for their misfortunes, even if it means screwing yourself over. You still think Republicans favor limited government. Your knowledge of politics and government are dwarfed by your concern for Britney Spears' children. You think buying Chinese goods stimulates our economy. You think you're going to get universal health care. You tolerate the phrase "enhanced interrogation techniques." You think the government is actually trying to improve education. You think watching CNN makes you smarter. You think two parties is enough. You can't spell. You think $9 trillion in debt is manageable. You believe in an afterlife for the sole reason that you don't want to die. You think lowering taxes raises revenue. You think the economy's doing well. You're an idiot.

Exhibit A: You couldn't get enough Anna Nicole Smith coverage.

Sentence: A gradual decline into abject poverty as you continue to vote against your own self-interest. Death by an easily treated disorder that your health insurance doesn't cover. You deserve it, chump."


To which I would add: You think the Earth is likely less than 10,000 years old. You tell all your friends about Airborne. You regularly check your horoscope because you claim "it's all in good fun". You don't need to know anything about evolution, because it's just a theory. You regard the teaching profession as overpaid and lazy, but when you encounter real working teachers as individuals you tell us how unappreciated we are. You live in a technological society that was created by the application of science, but you not only have no appreciation or understanding of what science is, you regard science education as a competing belief system that wants to undermine all you hold dear.

3 comments:

Stan said...

Scott, Scott, Scott...
You can too spell!

Anonymous said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
CarlaCarlaCarlaCarla said...

ugh-o-rama ...

Whats-his-name has suggested that Trent Lott (#49 on his Loathesome lineup) used to be ... a Democrat?

I'd have never thunk it ...

(Scott's right, PZ Mwahaha's list is worth visiting if only to see the oh-so-accurate Nicole Richie caricature.